Always thought Kevin Meaney was a brilliant comedian. Then we hung out in Ireland and I found out he was also a terrific person. RIP.
Well, I'll ask my INTERN AT dinner. Also, Am I ON AL Yankovic's guest list for Festival Supreme? I bought him a BAN…
The usual PROTOCOLS? I'm new so I don't want to disrespect my ELDERS.
Oh Jesus my shitty haircut and weak-ass jokes. Ugh. Oh well.

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Tue, May 25


@ 3:29 PM

Brian Corman apologized to me. Flat-out admitted his thievery, his stupidity. Owned it all. Good man. Still makes me wonder what he might have done to become valedictorian — I mean, if he’s willing to steal material for something as inconsequential as a speech, how rubbery did his boundaries become when his GPA and future career were on the line? Oh well.

I’ve taken the video down from my site, since it’s already all over the fucking internet. Mr. Corman alluded to Columbia students always taking the “hard road” in his speech. Welcome to the hard road, Bri-Bri.

And Columbia University, with its “high standards”, has honorably re-posted video of the speech on YouTube after briefly taking it down. They added this disclaimer, seen here in a screen grab:

Yep. Two spellings of my name. High standards, indeed. Did the salutatorian smash a watermelon?

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