Wait 'til you see CARNIVAL MAGIC. It's the new MANOS. Good God. @MST3K https://t.co/JgNkLoQSh6
Have fun at that farm upstate frolicking and playing with other animals and being super happy! https://t.co/yVlPCR5jCa
Hey @gianforte why don't you try body-slamming ME you pussy? ('Cuz then you'd fuck your back up I'm really fat is what I'm saying)
The Trump White House: aiding terrorism. https://t.co/K1eOo3MRuU

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Mon, Mar 17


PATTON''S BARGAIN BLURB BASEMENT

@ 5:21 PM

I just wrote yet another blurb for a friend's forthcoming book.     So far, I've only blurbed books I've actually read and enjoyed.

But I'm facing down four or five months of constant travel, film acting work, and writing under deadline.    I don't think I'm going to have time to honor any forthcoming blurb or review requests.

Until then, please feel free to use any of the following all-purpose blurbs:



"A delicious mocha-swirl of Wallace Stevens, Judy Blume and Tom Clancy!"

"Jesus brain-raping Christ, I loved these Christmas poems!"

"A literal roller-coaster ride!"

"Haunting...literally!"

"Black type-set words printed on white paper...literally!"

"Staten Island is bitterly cold, bleak, and 100% attraction-free!   A must!"

"Manages to evoke the British defeat at Ticonderoga, the stench of rotted crab legs, and Robert Loggia's voice!"

"Passably competent!"

"I'm yelling at nothing while I write this!    Here what it sounds like:   Blaaaaaaaaaaarrrrrrggggghhhhhh!"

"Why?  Dear God, WHY?!?"



 
 
   
   
   
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